Équipe: 2022-23 Oilers d'Edmonton

Date de création initiale: 25 août 2022

Publié: 4 sept. 2022

Mode - plafond salarial: Basique

Kinda hard to focus on hockey when it’s the hottest day in history here . . . A girl on the nude beach at Malibu told me that she’d do anything if it involved ice cubes. I figured out why when I realized what ELSE shrinks when you apply ice to it . . . it was so hot, I saw an eagle walking . . . Two lizards came into my house to get out of the sun . . . A couple was so desperate to cool off that they drove their convertible through an automated car wash with the top down . . . A cop in Santa Monica arrested two mokes for trying to steal a couple of oscillating fans from the Costco on Ocean Boulevard there. He looked at their identification and saw that they live in Pasadena, so he asked them why they came all the way across town to commit a crime when there’s a Costco in Pasadena. They said, Because Santa Monica cop cars have air conditioning.

At today's worship service, the pastor announced that there would be a special dispensation for anyone who farted during the sermon because it would bring the temperature in the church down.

And how was YOUR day?