Honestly... might try this in chel. Seems fun

I know you said to not take it seriously but here are my thoughts anyway Hehe.
think it's honestly not that bad but...
Andersen < Kuemper (not purely on skills but contract situation). Considering this, you are asking for a little too much.

Dvorak is cost controlled for so long and can bring a lot to any team. Samething for Chychrun even with the injuries, a top 3-4 dman signed under 5m for 5 years is veeeery valuable. Soderstrom is a blue chip prospect and those two first are definitly both top 20.

Id say leave out the goalies since Arizona don't need Andersen and then
Matthews
VS
Hayton, Chychrun and 2020 1st top3 protected or 2021 unprotected. That leaves JT as 1C, Hayton as the future 2C, a lot more of capspace and Chychrun can finally fix the right side + a more than likely top 15 pick.

Also, the NY is bad, just keep Reilly, he does more offensively while being better defensively. Angelo will ask for at least 5M anyway this summer/fall. Bad bad trade

Rielly does more offensively? Gee, and here i was thinking that DeAngelo finished T-4th in scoring among Dmen, and T-3rd in even strength scoring, all while carrying the corpse of Marc Staal for 20 mins a game. Defensively you have a point, but offensively? Nah mate

It's the first time he has a productive season like that. Anyway, whoever is the best offensively, I take Reilly overall 10 times out of 10.

Arizona can just wait when Matthews is a UFA.